Of Childhood Idols

A common question in interviews and one I have always liked to answer - ‘Do you consider anyone to be your idol?’ Being an avid reader and a superfan of technology, I always had an answer ready - Sudha Murthy! Why - cuz she has been a great inspiration for me - especially as a woman in technology - right from her standing first in her ME course at IISc to becoming the first hired woman employee (there’s a story behind this, too.. for interested readers) of TELCO, and from her being the seed investor behind Infosys to heading the Infosys Foundation which encourages and aids technology and science. I have always been deeply fascinated by her career and approach to life. I am sure if asked this question, you will have ready answers as well - ranging from Einstein to Tendulkar to Rooney to whoever-it-is.

On second thoughts, I discovered however, that more than these idols, it’s the ‘childhood idols’ - we’ll come to the definition in a minute - who inspire us the most. Remember when your cousin was posted to the USA? Or your neighbour stood first in the boards? Or your Professor received an award? Or some columnist who happened to sit next to you in a train journey telling you about his articles? Yes - somewhere or the other, it was these ‘normal’ people, who became your idols. Unknowingly, you were drawn towards their work and life and they became an inspiration for you.

In my case, I happened to idolize two such people in my life - as you can guess, one of them being my Uncle and the other, my cousin. Being from a normal family with a middle-class background, my uncle was the fifth in the line of siblings, the only son in the family. Obviously, he was supposed to manage the family soon enough, as my Mom tells me. She tells me how difficult it was, to study in a small house in a huge crowded community in Mumbai - whilst he seemed to ace the engineering exams like it were a ‘no big deal’. He was the first engineer in the family, only to be transported to the USA in the big boom of 90s, and has since ‘made it large’. Similar things can be said about my cousin. My Mom always told me - ‘Look at them, see how they worked hard for creating a life for themselves. And did so despite adversities - imagine giving an interview at wee hours of the morning (when it’s afternoon in the USA), preparing for it amidst all the hul-chul in the house...’

These words always remained at the back of my head. While preparing for JEE, while in IIT, while applying to univs and even studying and applying for jobs now - I keep in mind that hard work is what ultimately pays off. I keep in mind that one needs to dream big and work hard to achieve his dreams. I keep in mind that one needs to learn the ‘tricks of the trade’, be ready to change himself for the better and keep refreshing one’s knowledge for maintaining his success. I keep in mind all that these idols mean for me and speak to me - without actually speaking.

I remember all this now, as I happened to spend a three week vacation with them some days back. Well, it was, in a way, like you’d feel when you met Tendulkar. It was, in a way, like staying with your idols, and living with them. Maybe you won’t feel this now, but if you look deep in your heart and search for ‘that childhood idol’, you might be able to.

Lesson Number 2 :)

The previous post on Life, Liberty and Pursuit of Happiness was the culmination of my thoughts at the 'first
look' of the USA. As my exposure to the US grew, I have been having a few more thoughts about what makes this country IT and what is the essence of the principles that make this country IT.

This time, the trigger was watching 'Lagaan' again (#commencement week lukkha :D). The scene that shook
my mind was the one where Amir Khan is lacking the 11th member of the team and Kachra, the crippled,
so called 'untouchable', amazes him so much by his 'spin bowling' that Amir fights with the entire village to have him on the team. So much for equality. So much for the dignity of an individual. So much for humanity.

When I see people in the USA, I see in their eyes and mind what I see in Bhuvan's eyes in this scene. They respect every individual for what he is and for what he is doing. May it be the Food truck in the university, the bus driver, the landlord of the house, the bankers or students. I feel my hand shaking even as I write these 'divisions' of labor. Because when I meet the bus driver as soon as I step outside the house, he/she greets me with a smile, and a "hello, how are you doing?" And I cannot not say Hello back. A small greeting is what it takes to establish a connection. Then come the Food truck wala and the landlord. My landlord texts me like my friends do (obviously not so often :P), the Truck wala chats with me about the weather, and so on. Just last week, I was chatting for about a half hour with the local Internet-pay-station-wala (and no, he wasn't hitting on me :D)

Why do these people seem to have the self-esteem and courage that so many of us do not have? Why does a menial labourer in India feel that he's doing us a service? Isn't he in fact, doing something for us that we cannot do ourselves? Why does everyone respect engineers and doctors so much but whines when their son/daughter says she wants to be a chef? The answer is the same - we consider that the brain is the mightiest and everything else is lower than that. But seriously, everyone is just doing their job. Everyone is doing what they can do best. Everyone has been endowed a responsibility by God, according to what they can fulfill. And isn't the world such a pretty place because of that? What if there wasn't the truck wala? What if there wasn't the local postman who danced with me and my Mom whenever a scholarship letter arrived? What if there weren't people in hospitals and aeroplanes and construction workers and so on?

Agreed, everyone has a different liking, a different brain, a different ability. But they all deserve the same respect. The same kindness. The same smile and the same treatment. I am highly impressed by this country for this and I feel we all owe them this lesson.

Missing India...

Ah. Finally the trigger. Was thinking about writing how these days it has come to - waking up in the morning after a long dream about school, feeling like a child and wanting to not come out of the blanket but waiting for your Mom’s ‘ultimatum’ - ‘No breakfast for you if you don’t wake up NOW!’, listening to bollywood songs in the lab in loops, missing India on seeing a box of sweets sent by roommates’ parents, longing to visit the usual CCD you used to hang out at when back in India, having that sudden urge to ride the Scooty Pep/Active/Dio and of course, day-dreaming about things-to-do when you finally touch ‘base’, as one of my friends called it the other day :) This very base was the trigger through the theme song of Amir’s ‘Satyamev Jayte’ (if you haven’t yet, please listen to it here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXg6Usdjl5c)

Being away from the homeland for more than 7 months now, even the smallest of perturbations from the ‘stable state’ result in pangs of missing home, missing India. Agreed I have stayed in the hostel for four years before this, but then, there was always this feeling, I can sit in the train any time and reach home. Or, I can go to the nearest sweets mart to eat rasmalai, or I can hang out at Laxmi relishing Paneer Pasanda :) Here in Ithaca (and obviously, a contributing factor being that Ithaca has less to offer than some other Indian-ised cities like SF or Dallas), every move reminds me of something linked to India, and I go into this infinite loop of missing home - talk to ten people about it, who in turn, miss home and start listing what they miss about India - till finally someone looks into their phone (i.e. see the time) and chuckles, ‘chalo bey, khaana banana hain..’

And then I make the worse mistake of attributing wrong reasons to missing India. Am I really only missing India? Or do I just want to go back to the place where things are so easy, tailor-made for me - I have to do nothing but manage my own acads/work/etc. while other things are served to me ready on the plate? In other words, am I scared of growing up? Of being the sole person responsible for my actions? Of having to bear the consequences of whatever I do... alone? Maybe a little, my heart tells me. What the.., you can’t do that, says my brain, you’re old enough, you are no more a little kid. But I want to be, says the heart. You can’t, period (the brain). In the midst of this brain-heart wrestling, I realise I just burnt my sabjee and even that, now brings tears to my eyes..

Small(!) Joys in Life :)

Really? Watching live performances of Bollywood actors, singing to the music, literally ROFL-ing in the house, while munching on Indian snacks (thanks to room mates’ parents/relatives/cousins!) - that ain’t any small joy! Yes, I am talking about watching the Filmfare Awards on Sunday afternoon with room mates while 5000 miles away from the homeland, where they actually took place :)

It all began with the excitement created on Facebook by our friends back in India. Needless to say, we had checked the winners online after the awards happened, but status msgs like ‘Ranbir <3’, ‘Awesome Filmfare was awesome’ create such a longing in your heart... so much so that you announce, while having a late sunday lunch (or brunch or breakfast!) ‘Pleeeease let’s watch the filmfare awards?’ And there it is. The room is a ruckus. ‘Yeah my friend said they’re really awesome’, ‘Dude, SRK was so cute’, ‘No Ranbir was better she said’.. till finally the  tech-savvy person (which happens to be me :P) searches the web up and down and voila! Here is the familiar red carpet, the dazzling lights, the extravagant stage and the awesomely clad celebrities!

Well, in confession mode, it was my first time watching the entire Filmfare awards ceremony (yeah, yeah I can hear the muffled ‘muggoo’ :-/), so it was all the more exciting for me. However, the ceremony was really cool. Very well organized (it better be!), with the anchors - SRK and RK at their best - the jokes well thought out, the soft mockery actually making sense (lol), their accurate timing and innovative dressing styles ;), use of ‘logical’ special effects all through the show, good-tending-towards-awesome dance performances by the ladies - and the (overheard) supreme Shaan’s performance (that we missed :( ) Perfect for watching in the *Pardes* :)

The high spot of the ceremony, though, had to be the short film with SRK and RK vying for Rakhi Sawant, wherein Shakti Kapoor emerges out of Rakhi Sawant’s mask - that made us literally roll on the floor laughing, not caring that we hadn’t swept the floor for weeks now! #grad-life Two of us didn’t even see the next part because we were so busy laughing :D Indeed, close to three hours of frenzy, epic FF awards were epic :)

Does one really need a reason to connect back to the homeland? And something extravagant to be happy? And people more awesome than who can join you in your mad ideas? :)